rewatched ai no kusabi.
sobbed.

never, am i going to do sth this beautiful.
and never is the world going to have such beautiful love.
because all u believe is worthiness.
love is not worth ur commitment.
love is not worth your life.
enriching ur brain is worth it.
getting a job, getting a family, mundane life, worth it.

u even categorise the things i watch and read as a waste of time.

i say they are the most beautiful creations of man.
imagination that never comes true in reality.

nobody cries like me.

i realised that i suck as a fren, i cried.
i watched trailer of eight under, i cried.
time to sleep, cry.

i dont hate myself.
i hate the fact that i have to cry for this kinda things.
i hate you.

i hate the fact that i simply cant do it.
cant ever do it.

this shit life sux.
im no longer surviving for the sake of me.
empty, yet overflowing with tears.

and this blog isnt even a blog now.
why the hell.